Nell Bell's "Why" Story

So I began running in High School, what a better way to get out of the house from an abusive step father. It was time to be free to not have any fear or worries. My step dad would mentally and physically abuse me since I was in diapers. He used to tell me as a very young child " I wish you were dead" "if it wasn't for your mother...you'd be tossed to a foster home" Heck I've heard every name under the sun. He was an evil person who enjoyed seeing people suffer. I used to runaway a lot or I was forced to sleep outside in the backyard like a dog. So running in High school, this was my escape and my sanctuary. I was a track star and also in the cross country team. 

Then College came around but i really had no clue or guidance on what I wanted to do. My step-dad thankfully passed away from a heart attack.  I found happiness again by joining the College's cross country team. I was in my prime with 7 minute mile pace for my runs. I was loving life until I suddenly got injured. Back at that time in high school, there wasn't something I can refer to online for running tips, we didn't have garmin's or focused on sports nutrition. I would bring coke as my form of hydration for my runs. We definitely weren't aware of the importance of a running shoe or how big of a deal it is to wear the right shoe. So I wore the wrong shoe for running and ended up getting a stress fracture. I even ignored the pain and kept running. My coach would tell me to keep wrapping it and ice my foot. I would wrap my foot tighter and tighter because I wanted to still run but the pain was becoming unbearable. The coach would have us run hardcore intense sprints and runs almost everyday. We hardly had an "easy day". Then one morning I got out of bed and the pain on my foot was so intense i fell on my face. Went to check out my foot, the doctor showed me the X ray...he said it looked like someone threw a bottle on the wall and it broke into a 1000 pieces.  This was devastating news. 

It literally took almost 10 years to even try and run normal again within those 10 years, I got extremely depressed, very angry at myself and the world, gained over a 100 pounds and even lost a child while pregnant because of how unhealthy and bad off I was. I committed suicide twice, one time in High School and then in college after this injury. I realized I had to get myself together and find a way to get out of feeling sorry for myself. I ended up meeting friends who were awesome and encouraging. I tried to run at my 10th year and suddenly I can run without feeling anymore discomfort or pain! I might not be able to run as fast as I used to but I can run!! I got back into road running, lost enough weight to get into the military. The military would help me become disciplined and constantly busy that I won't have time to think negative! And it was true!! I knocked out a few years at the military and during my last command I started trail running in 2016. From there I took off and fell in love with myself and the love of running. I also have met so many amazing runners. My running excelled so quickly with trail running I ended up running some 50ks, my 50 miler, my first 100k and my first 100 miler all within a year!!! Also note that with my 50 miler, I ended up running 100 miles two weeks later!  What I got out of all this is to never lose faith, find the right support system, immediately kick out the negative people who don't support you and keep making goals. I'm so much happier now than I ever have been in my 20s. I am looking forward to knocking out so many more goals. No matter what you do in life do it for yourself not to please others. And its never too late to to make changes to better yourself!!